A Life Summed Up

My father-in-law passed away this last week and we had his service yesterday--complete with a 21-gun salute, folding of the flag, and more. It was very moving and very meaningful. Of course, it was sad for all of us to lose Grandpa, but we know he's in heaven with Jesus and is complete and whole.

Today, I'm exhausted from the emotion and activity of the weekend. And perhaps that's why my thoughts are more melancholy than usual. But I'm considering today how a long life can be summed up in a couple paragraphs for an obituary or a eulogy. Just the highlights. Not the details of a laugh or a conversation or a silly response to grandkids. Not the things that make up a person in our minds and hearts. All of those things will not be written down for generations to come--just the highlights.

And it makes me ponder the fleeting nature of life here on earth. One of my nephews read a great quote from the end of the Chronicles of Narnia that reminds me of what my friend RoseAnne once said to me: This life on earth is like a period at the end of a prologue. The rest--the real book, the real adventures are to come in heaven. They're eternal.

I can't help thinking that we're each a link in a long chain. We need to be faithful to do what God calls us to--not to be famous or to leave a legacy--but to keep the chain of faith going. There is something very powerful about passing on to the next generation what we've received from the generation before us. And for this period of time--this very short time--that's what matters most.

Our time is so fleeting. May we be found to be a faithful link in the chain!

Comments

[Chris Yount Jones]

Here's an email my husband sent me in response...

I was thinking more about your blog and Don’s death – and liked what you said. Nouwen has an interesting perspective on death:

Making Our Deaths Gifts

How do we make our deaths gifts for others? Very often people's lives are destroyed, harmed, or permanently wounded by the deaths of their relatives or friends. We have to do whatever we can to avoid this. When we are near death what we say to those who are close to us, whether in spoken or in written words, is very important. When we express gratitude to them, ask forgiveness for our shortcomings and offer forgiveness for theirs, and express our sincere desire that they continue their lives without remorse but remembering the graces of our lives, then our deaths can become true gifts.

That made me think about Don’s gift to you and your kids prior to his passing – of saying “Hi” twice, of being excited by your presence, of being very happy and enthused about seeing you. I’m glad he got some quality time with his family and friends prior to his passing – and it even presents an interesting question. In the week prior to his death, or even after his death, what are the things from his life that you saw that you want to hang onto as gifts from Don? Truly an obituary or eulogy is so short, and doesn’t give the “flavor” of an individual’s presence on earth – but sometimes even the small things about a person can be gifts to our lives and represent their true “flavor” in our lives. Don’s gift was genuine excitement about your presence in his life. My guess is that’s also how God views us – genuine excitement about the times we choose to spend in His presence – almost like pulling up an armchair beside us and saying “Hi!” with excitement and gratitude that we’ve chosen to spend a few moments in His presence. Thinking about God with that metaphor makes me realize I need to spend more time in His presence, and also be grateful for my belief that God truly is excited and joyful when we choose to spend time with Him.

[Chris Yount Jones]

Ray,
This is really good! And it makes me think that it's the little things that matter most. We get so caught up in the awards, accomplishments, fame, or whatever. And the funny thing is I can't remember the names of the medals he was awarded, but I do remember tons of little things that meant a lot to me in the way he would treat me. Thank you for this reminder.